Because it's dangerous. He is dangerous.
It scares me to think about losing my heart again.
What if it doesn't end well?
What if my heart gets broken again?
I know who I am now.
I know what my goals are. What my needs are.
I know how to keep myself strong and rely on myself for strength.
I have an amazing group of friends who love and support me.
But is it enough?
Have I healed enough?
I know what real love is now. I know that it looks and feels differently to everyone.
It can't be compared between lovers.
Every relationship it's unique. Something you'll never have exactly the same with someone else.
Sometimes you love someone because they need you or you need them.
Sometimes there's a chemistry that pulls the two of you together like magnets.
A magnetism that rare is hard to find and even harder to replace or heal from when it's gone.
So is it worth it?
To risk being in such a good place and losing control.
What if I fall and no one is there to catch me?
I have capacities to give and love and nurture.
When is it ok to use those gifts?
To use them means I have to make a part of myself vulnerable.
I have to weigh the cost of that sacrifice with the unknown outcome.
The real question is do I have faith in love or chemistry anymore?
Do I trust that if I open my heart again it won't get stepped on?
Is he worth it?
Can i trust him with my heart?
Does he even know himself enough to be able injure trust his own heart?
I don't want to be someone else's mistake or regret.
I want to be their person. The one that completes them. The one they can't live without. Period.
I don't know if that's where this is headed but I want to give it a chance.
Does he see me as worth the risk too?
No comments:
Post a Comment