Busy - 10/20

My life is better without you in it... Haha. That's cute. How many times did you say that to me? I think the evidence speaks for itself.

Haven't had much time to write today. Chats this morning and I had one of the new guys shadowing me which was fun. Went to lunch with the 1 o'clock crew which of course happens to be mainly men around college age lol oh well.... It was fun. I really can't seem to focus this afternoon on anything. Good thing there isn't much to do on Friday afternoons. 

I'm going to Kanzaa again tonight... Hoping there's a better crowd than last time I was there. Not many men that can dance which always sucks since half the songs are two step. And for someone like me who apparently gets stereotyped right away as a lesbian it's not a great move for me to go out on the dancefloor with another girl. Kinda kills all my chances right there. So... Here's to hoping for some men to be there. Who knows maybe my mystery cowboy, Logan, will show up again. He was the one I danced with way back in April... Still have yet to beat that experience. Talk about chemistry... Wowsers

How are you? How's work? I've heard the leadership in support have kinda been a nightmare. How's Courtney doing with Isaiah working there? Man I wish I could be a fly on the wall with that one. 

I wanna wear something sexy tonight... But not slutty. Can't get the two confused. I can't decide what to do...hmmm 

I wanna be swept off my feet tonight. I want the heat and passion like I had with you. I got a taste of that...literally lol... Last week with D. My heart craves that so much right now. I just want to feel normal. To feel desired. To be wanted. It just burns deep down inside me...I can't get rid of it. You stirred this up inside me... And now I can't get it to die.

Not getting many hits on studio apartments with a short term lease. I'm gonna end up in some shady area of town that only offers month to month because mostly hookers and druggies live there... I'm totally kidding btw. Lol but really... It shouldn't be this difficult. May just need to up our budget on this to get something which I'm willing to do. 

I had done really complex technical cases the last couple days that I'm trying to wrap up before the weekend. I don't know if I'm actually beginning to understand this stuff or if I'm just getting really good at BSing my way through an issue lol Either way I'm incredibly proud of myself.

Have I mentioned that I really love my team? Like all of them, leadership and coworkers... It's such a great atmosphere here. It makes life seem a little less awful right now. Totally not trying to gloat at all...I just am really thankful I landed this job and I owe a lot of that to you. You pushed me and gave me the confidence I needed. I'd I didn't have this in my life right now I would really be in a bad place. Having this one thing that's right in my life helps me keep my sanity a little more easily.

I didn't really have much time for emotions today... Just the way I like it.

Well nothing super sexy... Just really couldn't find anything to wear tonight. I think I know already no one will be looking at me between the 2 blondes and the redhead I'll be with all night. Oh well... Brunettes have more fun anyways. I'm gonna go out tonight and have a blast. I'm gonna just talk to everyone and dance and just enjoy not thinking about how much my life sucks right now. I think those are all positive things at this point. Guess I'll let you know if I accomplished my goals in the morning!